Friendship Grown Up

Friends I count myself among the fortunate to have had and still have many friends in my life.  Some linger, some are on the fringe, some are new and some are older.  A few got away for one reason or another.  One left in a huff and while I tried to recover the friendship and discover the cause of the difficultly it was not to be.

While I missed my friend I also missed her children.  They had been very special to me and to my family.  They were both particularly good friends with my son and having a connection with them somehow kept alive another connection with him.  When their mother severed ties, it became difficult to continue a relationship with these two lovely young women.

Thanks to the wonder of Facebook we have managed to stay in touch and have a bit of handle on each other lives but last night, after 10 years of missing them we met again for the first time since they have become “all grown up”.

We talked for hours and I completely forgot my manners and didn’t even offer them more tea.  I was so interested to hear what has happened in their lives since they have grown from children to women.  I was blessed they felt free enough to share intimate details of how their lives have unfolded…the good and the difficult.

We laughed about shared joy and we talked about my boy Bryan.  It is always so wonderful to be with people who will say his name and who have such fond memories of him.

I hope it is not another ten years before I see them again but it could well be.  It is wonderful though to know they are no longer children of a friend but have become my grown friends.

Thanks girls for the blessing you are to me and to many.  I will hold last night as a fond memory in my life.


About Peggy Guiler

You just never know what show up on my blog. As the name implies it is about the stuff of life just like Spilt Milk. Everyday events spark thought and contemplation. Special events in the community, the country or the world may strike a cord and get me talking. Sometimes it's about people in my life or circumstances, sometimes about my garden, sometimes about a book or a political issue. Always it's about something I am passionate about. In my business, River of Hope Enterprises (, I work as an "Certified Coach" (International Coach Federation), a trainer, consultant and speaker. and as a spiritual director. I also drive a school bus to keep the wolf from the door while I build my business. I love the kids on the bus (most of the time). My family is grown and I have three grandkids who thrill my heart but I don't get to see any of them very often. Circumstances of life have made "family" difficult. My son died by suicide at age 16 in 2000 and the strain on our family relationships since has been huge. Mental health is a field where I worked for almost 22 years and where I still do some consulting and training. That combined with my own battle with depression and my son's death weave together to form some of my greatest soap box items: suicide intervention, suicide bereavement and peer support in mental health are right on the top of my list. Social justice is an underlying passion. Keeping the wolf from the door as a single parent was full-time work and my career path as a journalists was augmented with cleaning contracts, cooking, retail clerk, and bartending. I have known hard work and am grateful for the experience and perspective it has given me. A firmly grounded faith and a passion for learning has now taken me toward a new field as a Spiritual Director and I am soon adding to that a license to marry people. As I move toward retirement I am very aware that I have to keep working so I chose to do things which will meet my modest financial needs and also my love of supporting people in their life journey. Woven into all of this is my love of writing. Trained as a Journalist, and having worked in the field as a freelance news writer for many years, I have a great love for writing. This blog is a new beginning for me. As I hone my skills and begin to form a daily discipline of writing I hope it will lead to more writing in the future.
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One Response to Friendship Grown Up

  1. I’m sorry about your friend but it’s lovely you’ve kept in contact with her daughters. It’s wonderful to have someone who shares memories of Bryan.

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